Friday, 4 March 2011

hardest decision...

difficult yet productive and successful week
(as you know I went to the UK last thursday
for once this was not work related)

like any parent i adore my child
storm and i have been through alot together
and we have been the one constant in one anothers 
lives for the last 16 years
we have a solid loving and fun relation
and living together  is generally easy and agreeable

yet for 5 years I have begged bribed screamed and cried
at my son to work at school
the education system in france is fierce and unforgiving
everything works on averages and doors close fast
options are quickly limited and many late bloom kids 
under achieve in life

for months I have been battling with a dilemma
what to do for my son  
16 out of education and lost in france

when we arrived here in 2001 he was 7
and got an average report grade of 17/20
this time last year his average mark was 4/20
and he was hanging out with the 
drug dealers being groomed

so for nearly a year he has been by my side
helping me with my work
painting furniture and doing the housework
no life for an adolescent lad

he refused education and wants to work
sadly in france youngsters cannot work until 18
when we went to the careers advisor the lady
having been told by storm that he was 
interested in tourism suggested 
my intelligent bilingual son consider eventually 
working as a chambermaid!

UK kids can work at 16 if they wish
and so eventually son and father
       (who lives in england)
reluctantly relented and saw the logic of storm living in the UK

so last week 
I handed my beloved boy over to the 
care of this dad
for an indefinite period

my beautiful boy sent me a card with a lottery ticket and love

yesterday storm had his first interview in a country house hotel
and hoorah he has been offered a 2 week trial in the kitchen

and if he performs 
(he is expected to be able to cook a tiptop English breakfast
by the end of his fortnight)

a position as trainee chef/goffer 
which entails 4 days hotel work/1 day college a week

even storm says he can swallow a day a week at study
and it is ironic that the dish he is expected to russle up
is his absolute favorite a 'full english breakfast' 

and  that I know he can swallow



Heidi said...

You made me cry Momma....Oh I can't even are such a wonderful Mom you put him first and he is going to soar......Thinking of you!

Cari-Jane Hakes said...

What a sweet boy/man! You obviously did a good job xx

gallerydarrow said...

tears and hugs xo

Brown Paper & String said...

Wow! Your heart must be breaking and yet be proud and pleased that Storm may have found his niche.
Thinking of you!

Ann said...

I understand.

Being a Mom is far from easy, that's for sure!

mary said...

It is so hard to push them out of the nest and then to suffer their absence. Be well.

'odd and old' Linda Dacey said...

thanks one 'n all
for your kind words
and support
as usual

Rebekah Leigh said...

*Hugs* This must be such a tough time for you, but its so great that he has been offered this new work position..He sounds like an amazing young man!Sending you positive,happy thoughts.. :-)

Anonymous said...

I can appreciate the difficulty of making this change. In my son's second year of high school he also was getting with the wrong group of people. I had to send him to live with his grandparents for the last 2 years of schooling. Fortunately for me it was close enough we could visit several times a month and we talked on the phone several times a week. In fact we talked more when he did not live with me.
I would rather have had him with me but I did what I had to do for a better future for him.
Even though their parenting ways and mine were not the same. I had to hope I had done my best for 16 years.
Because your on is being given a new challenge in a job he should enjoy hopefully he will get back on a good path.

lisa said...

you are very strong and you are setting a good example for your son. Fill him with love and know you are doing the right thing. Remember to take care of yourself too.

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad your son is in a good place. Oh, I know how heavy your mother's heart must be. I went through a similar situation with my own children, where they wanted to finish school back in their hometown...1200 miles away where their father lives. Have a lovely day ~ xox Alexandra

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